A sneaky little thing called anxiety..

Hey heyyyy!! Happy Wednesday to you! Thanks for stopping by the blog today!!

I hope your week is going well, it seems to be a pretty good one over here! I’ve been enjoying these past two days with Michael since he has both Mondays and Tuesdays off from work; it’s been nice to spend some time with him! (He goes back to work today, whomp whomp) But on the upside (there is always an upside, right?) I have next week off and he has four days off in a row!! I am looking forward to that! I actually tried talking him into taking a spontaneous short Disney trip, but I failed miserably. It would be really fun, in my opinion. JetBlue is having their two day winter sale still going on today, and Disney has a pretty great deal for Passholders…so maaaaaybe I will try to bribe him some more today and try to win him over?! Pretty please with cherries on top 😉

Today I wanted to talk about something that is fresh on my mind….a sneaky little thing called anxiety.

I’ve been trying my best at getting a handle on it lately. It seems to spark up whenever I am stressed out about something (or anything for that matter). This is something that I really want to take control of this year along with my new years resolutions, because I don’t want to live a life that is filled with anxiety. The other day I was panicking on the couch talking with Michael about how I am nervous about the stupidest things if I do say so myself. Like for instance: I don’t want to go to the doctors, or the dentist. Which in fact, I do need to go to the dentist because I haven’t been in YEARS. Gross, I know, but anxiety and fear will do that to you. I actually surprised myself when I went to my ob/gyn a couple months ago because that is something that I reschedule and cancel and reschedule again, but I seem to have broken that cycle! This panic I was in the other night came from out of NO where, literally. I don’t have any appointments scheduled, and the point that this came on when it was like 8:00 at night while watching tv with my husband just shows how stupid anxiety is and how abrupt these panic attacks can happen at any moment. Another thing I was panicked about? My dry skin on my face, guys. Wtf? It sounds so stupid thinking about it now, but in that moment I was stressing myself out thinking about the awful appearance of my face. I actually caused myself to break out in hives, which then Michael told me to calm down. The point is, this whole panic attack/anxiety wasn’t because I didn’t want to go to the doctors or the dentist or because my face is dry, it’s because something else was bothering me. Whenever I am stressed out, anxiety likes to creep in and cause me to think of absurd things to freak out about. Which is so not fun. And so not okay in my book. So, this year, I am taking hold of this. There are SO many things that I am afraid of, so many things that cause me to panic whenever I think about it, and I need to get a hold on some of them this year. Like for instance: I am so afraid of being pregnant. There, I said it. I know it sounds so silly and probably so pathetic, but I am so scared. And don’t even get me started on needles and getting blood taken, which is something that I obviously have to go through if I want to have a child. These are thoughts that run through my head daily when someone brings up any comment about having a baby, about my nephews having cousins, or anything along the lines of babies. OF COURSE I want to have a baby. I love children so much and the thought of Michael and I having our own makes my heart melt, but then makes me go into a full on panic thinking about being pregnant and having to go through all of that. So yes, getting a handle on my anxiety is something that I want to conquer this year, which I guess goes hand in hand with my new years resolution to “Do something that scares you” because HELLO: everything seems to scare me.

However, there is one time that I do not think about all of this crap, and that is when I am working out and running or walking on the treadmill. All of those fears, all of the little things that cause me stress, and all of that anxiety just melts away once I get in the zone, which is probably why I have loved working out for so many years. I fell in love with the fact that however long I was working out was my time when I didn’t have to answer to anyone, I didn’t have to talk to anyone, and I didn’t have to think about anything. Well, if you want to, I guess you can think, but that probably makes the time go by super slow, unless however you are thinking about something fantastic and something that makes you happy. But anyways, I somehow found a way to shut my brain off to anything and everything that stresses me out/makes me anxious while I am working out. Brilliant, right? I figure it is because exercise gives you endorphins, and endorphins make you happy!

And since being happy is another one of my new years resolutions, I have been working this body out indeed! This morning started with a 20(ish) minute bodyweight workout that looked like this: 60 jumping jacks, 50 squats, 40 side crunches (40 on each side), 30 sit ups,  20 push ups, 10 burpees, repeating that 3 times through. I finished that with a 1 minute plank, then ran on the treadmill for 30 minutes. It was a great start to this Wednesday!!

Well, more on this topic later (obviously), but for now I want to leave you with one of my favorite verse’s: Isiah 41:10. A verse that I keep close to my heart when I feel anxious in anyway, because I know the Lord will strengthen me!

103247cceb478d0de9e038208420e950--scribe-scripture-art.jpg

Have a fabulous day!! XOXO ♥♥

Leave a Reply